The Walking Dead: Carol, Morgan and the list
By Susie Graham
Carol Peletier and Morgan Jones have an interesting relationship on The Walking Dead. The apocalypse has affected both of them in many of the same ways at different times.
Morgan saw that Carol was more than the coffee pouring, cookie passer-outer at the quarry site while planning the herd parade. She seemed observant, ready.
When the W group attacked, Morgan found out just how ready Carol was. He told her she didn’t like the killing. That was the beginning of Carol reflecting on the Carol she has become. She didn’t have to like him or agree with him to recognize a truth.
Carol may not have known Morgan before, but surely she had heard small pieces of his story, especially when Rick, Michonne, and Carl returned from the weapons gathering trip in Clear. She knows Morgan isn’t speaking without experience. He’s been to rehab.
When Mr. Wolf was alive and a threat, she wasn’t interested in Morgan’s well-being. She would kill him to keep the rest of the group safe. But things are peaceful now. She doesn’t see the need to hurt him. He’s hurting. He has secrets. She has secrets.
Nobody knows what she had to do to Lizzie. What she and Tyreese saw Lizzie had done to Mika. She never told Rick how close to death Judith really was before Terminus, and not from the prison attack.
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Carol is keeping a list in a journal. Morgan kept notes on the chalkboard in his apartment. Maybe the lists make it real. Maybe the notes help expose the secrets.
Carol told Rosita that Morgan doesn’t like the killing. She allowed him his feelings. Maybe she’s envious that he gets to say it out loud. She doesn’t like it either, but she wants to protect everyone else from the ugliness so she will do it anyway.
Her protective nature has now even extended to Morgan and Denise. She knows how Rick would respond and she would rather keep the secret for them.
There’s a line about the wife of an abusive alcoholic in the movie Affliction that has stuck with me. It can apply to Carol in the way that she lives and adapts, but never takes care of her own needs.
“You never know how much women like that suffer. It’s like they live their lives with the sound turned off — and then they’re gone.”